Problem with being a Donor

There is always a need for a child in a person or couples life. That overgrown need to bear a child of your own seems to be strong among women.I never knew of this pain until I lost a child of my own.
I'm in the process of writing a book about about my experience of being Jennifer Smith 180. Jennifer Smith 180 is not my real name but to many couples that is the name on the eggs I donated to them. The thought of my egg with another sperm who is not my hubby I have to admit is strange. I joked with my hubby at least I will know what my child would look like black, with red hair and all the many different traits a child can carry on from the biological parents. I guess what I did was a great thing to do but the reason I became a donor was brought upon making a choice not to have any more children. I took a pregnancy test this past Thursday which was negative. To my surprise I really wanted to be pregnant. It's in our nature to love a child. I have been overcome by a set of emotions I never took the time to look at. I received a call to donate again. I' m not sure what I will say to my hubby. I love to be able to give a couple the chance to have children like I did all four times before. This time writing this book I think I have to deal with my emotions first. Look for my book in the coming year.
I'm Jennifer Smith 180
By: Myself Truly Patricia Needham