Monday, October 19
You just have to find that strength deep inside of you to take a stand.
Just because your parents had that life doesn't mean you have to repeat it. Know your worth it will help you. Don't let people punch you slap you call you out of your name. If a friend or family member talks to you about Domestic Violence please listen. Domestic Violence happens everyday all day long. Someone needs to be the voice to get this subject to be the hot topic and it will take someone famous to do it. As sad as that is someone needs a huge pull among society to get the talk to happen. I paid attention to Nicole Brown because my household was violent day in day out. I left when I was 16 never looked back and I still won't. I still did repeat my mothers footsteps. Only for a short time I realized that was not the life for me. That was not what I wanted. I made a choice to leave. It was the hardest choice I ever had to make. My abuser never was charged in the death of our baby. I miscarried which helped make my decision to leave. I wish I left sooner. If someone would have told me that life was wrong. Would I have listen? I'm not sure I just hope Domestic Violence Stops before everyone is lost in the past like Nicole Brown.
Saturday, October 17
Thursday, October 15
I used to wake up in night sweats running to my son's bedroom to make sure he is there.
Make sure he is alive.
I left so long ago but still shudder at the thought of the pain.
My flash backs seem so real at times.
How your hand hit my face.
How you took advantage of me.
Sometimes I think I see you in the shadows.
I don't talk much in fear that you will find me.
Hiding was never my strong suit yet your emails and letters still come.
You still find me on the web.
Even when I hear your name.
I have to control my breathing as a flash backs hits my brain.
I have no control when I remember something of my past.
I used to cry when they appear.
It used to bother me
It used to continue to keep me in fear.
I still don't sleep as well.
Staying up late at night checking on my son who will never know you.
He will never know the pain.
He will never see you hit me.
He will never hear your voice as you cut me down over and over.
Even if you appear he won't know you.
A lie you say for keeping him safe.
A lie I will hold to my grave.
You don't have control over me today or any day now.
My past won't control me any longer.
My past made me who I am today.
Because of you this will never happen to me again.
Because of you I found true love today.
A man who will cherish my life as his own.
A man who is a father a real father to my son.
A man who never raises his voice.
Never calls me out of my name
A man who doesn't hit me like a punching bag.
Because of you My soul is free today.
I just received this today thought I would share.
Tuesday, April 14
- The overall police response to domestic abuse is lacking, despite considerable improvements having been made in recent years. In many cases, inadequate service has been provided to victims, and this means that they are placed at an unnecessary risk.
- Domestic violence is listed as a priority in the Police and Crime Plans of most forces, yet in practice, it sometimes does not receive the importance it merits.
- Some of the factors that contribute to an inadequate response include:
- A lack of clear leadership and direction from senior officers.
- Problems in core activities, especially with regards to the collection of evidence at the scene of the crime.
- A failure to promote proper behavior, attitudes and actions on the part of officers.
- The failure to place domestic abuse as a priority when determining day-to-day priorities, routines and assignments for frontline officers.
- An inadequate feedback system that will highlight the experience of victims with respect to police response. It is vital that the voices of victims be heard; they can provide police with a keen understanding of the nature of abuse and the many forms in which it can be manifested.
- Police officers need to have the required training and tools they require to provide the right response to victims. Officers need to be aware of the nature of domestic violence, and of the effects it can have on victims, children and society.
- The lack of priority given to domestic abuse means that often, police miss the opportunity of tracking down aggressors and serious consequences can ensue.
- An improvement is required in the information technology accessed by officers, so they can obtain more information about the victim or perpetrator when they arrive at the relevant home.
- Police can find it more difficult to respond appropriately when psychological intimidation is used instead of physical violence.
- The initial response of officers to a situation of violence is crucial, yet in some cases, victims can appear to be uncooperative out of a sense of future repercussion from the perpetrator or because the relationship is marked by addiction or codependence. Police officers need to be aware of the sometimes ambiguous response they may receive from a victim. The report notes that all too often, the service a victim receives depends entirely on the skills of empathy of the particular police officer involved.
- A quick police response is not sufficient; officers also need to ensure victims know that they are being taken seriously and that they are not being judged. When these qualities are not present in police officers, it can undermine the confidence of victims.
- Police officers need greater awareness of who is responsible for what; often, a confusion as to roles leads to inadequate service being provided.
- The assessment of victims as either high, medium or standard risk cases, needs to be reviewed.
Monday, October 20
Domestic violence does not discriminate. It occurs in our neighborhoods and in our families. Anyone can be a victim, regardless of gender, race, age, ethnicity, sexual orientation, or economic status. Abusers control and terrorize our daughters, bosses, sisters, friends, and even our SONS – who are most often abused by their male partners and sometimes their female partners. Join the Empowered Women of Purpose at "I Matter," an event devoted to bringing awareness and healing to the domestic violence epidemic. There will be a candlelight vigil to bring people together to remember those who lost their lives, fought to save their lives and honor anyone who is affected by domestic violence.
Friday, October 3
I wish there was an easier way to explain to the world that this is a problem. It's not normal for a man to hit a woman. It's not love when he says he is sorry while you are on the floor in tears apologizing for something you shouldn't have to apologize for. I'm grateful that this subject is getting the light it needs. There are many women who need help twice as many men who don't say a thing. 1 in 4 women are abuse a day. Most of them have children who view the violence as a part of life. It is not apart of a happy family. Please talk to the ones who you know need help. Don't blame them it is hard to see the other side. It's often looked as it's the victims fault when they don't leave. Take it from someone who has been through the pain hell and back. It's the feeling no one will understand. It's the feeling of not wanting people to know what is really going on in your life. The fear that is inside of making your partner mad. Remember fear is Real death is real. A woman is three times more likey to be killed by her abuser then if she stayed. Take a moment and educate yourself go sit in a meeting to try and understand how one feels. Don't be so quick to judge a person. Listen first with your ears and heart. Love doesn't have to hurt! Please help this October to bring awareness That DOMESTIC VIOLENCE is real. It needs to stop wear purple to support!
Tuesday, September 9
This is just a story by an unknown Author
It's not your fault A REAL MAN DOESN'T HIT! Love doesn't hurt like that. Don't give up find someone to talk to talk. Someone will listen someone will help you. Just because you grow up in that kind of world doesn't mean you have to stay. Please seek help. Please don't allow someone to degrade you. Know your Worth Know who you are. Someone special someone who is worthy of being loved by someone who will adore you. Know the signs of an abuser.
Tuesday, October 29
Sunday, October 27
Do you feel afraid of your partner much of the time?
Does your partner:
If you have answered YES or some to most of these it's time to get out. REMEMBER it's Not your Fault. You can't control what someone else does. You can't change them no matter how hard you try. No matter how hard you try to convince yourself you are the one who will get though to him or her. It won't change they won't change. There is help Please call the National Domestic Violence hot line.
24/7 PHONE SUPPORT
Friday, October 25
List of ways to help for domestic violence awareness month.
1. Host a clothing-swap fund-raiser, where you pass a hat to raise funds for domestic violence shelters. Identify a needy shelter in your area and register your swap (or find one near you) at swapforgood.org. San Francisco pals Brianna Cayo Cotter, 29, and Orli Cotel, 31, (pictured) launched Swap for Good in April with no money (friends helped design the site). Within months, the nonprofit had raised $2,800. Now the swaps are catching on nationwide.
2. Search using goodsearch.com. Type in "National Domestic Violence Hotline," then surf the Internet as you normally would. The site's browser is powered by Yahoo; every time you search, GoodSearch will donate about a cent to NDVH. With millions of us clicking, that's big money!
3.Shop on October 17 at Macy's or on macys.com. If you buy a "Shop for a Cause" ticket, your $5 will go to the Family Violence Prevention Fund RESPECT! campaign, and you'll save 10 to 20 percent on most purchases, plus 25 percent on one in-store item.
4. Join Liz Claiborne Inc.'s Love Is Not Abuse Coalition at loveisnotabuse.com, to help end teen dating abuse. As a member, you'll learn how to work with educators and legislators to get a dating-abuse education curriculum into schools.
5. Recycle old cell phones, laptops, and other electronics by sending them to Recycle for Domestic Violence (recyclefordomesticviolence.com), and they'll donate to the domestic violence charity of your choice.
6. Text HOTLINE to 85944 to instantly donate $5 to the National Domestic Violence Hotline, which connects those in crisis to local shelters and resources.
7. Donate your clunker car by visiting ncadv.org/takeaction/donateacar.php and all proceeds will benefit the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, which supports programs such as safe houses, educational initiatives, and policy development.
8. Accessorize with "Empowerment" tees and jewelry at avon.com. The proceeds will go to the Avon Foundation to end violence against women.
9. Tune in to talk radio on December 8, when hosts nationwide will talk to celebs, advocates, and survivors about how to end the cycle of abuse . It's all part of the seventh annual It's Time to Talk Day.
10. Reach out to a friend who you suspect might be in an abusive relationship. "Gently express your concern and ask questions about her situation, and listen without judgment," suggests Jane Randel, the director of the Love Is Not Abuse campaign. "If she shares evidence of abuse, emphasize that whenever she wants help, you'll be there." Encourage her to call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-SAFE.
A little help can go a long way. Don't forget to turn Facebook purple for the rest of October.
Sunday, October 20
It's very important to keep a paper trail, pictures and any voice mail of the abuse. It is easier to help prove if you go to court. In any case you should seek protection from the police. A lot of officers both men and women may not believe you. Please don't give up that is why a paper trail is very important to have. I have a lot of people who follow my blog from Michigan. Here is what you can do. Please don't stay silent.
Remember to keep the information somewhere where your abusers won't find it.
Maybe at a trusted friends house who will help you leave for good. Be safe!!
Domestic Violence Laws in Michigan Viewing 3 of 9 Spouses or romantic partners committing violence on each other or on any children in the home is a serious crime that can involve jail time. Every state has its own laws regarding domestic violence. Michigan has specific laws designed to curtail and punish acts of domestic violence in the state. Definitions Michigan law defines a domestic relationship as one in which two people are either spouses or former spouses, in a dating relationship or former dating relationship, have children in common, or are current or former residents of the same household. If such a relationship exists, the laws concerning domestic violence apply to a violent incident. Violence can take the form of physical, sexual or emotional/verbal abuse. If a man threatens to kill his girlfriend, for example, domestic abuse laws would apply even if he made no physical contact with the woman. Child Custody Michigan law allows Michigan social services to take immediate control of any children in the home during a domestic violence investigation they have been abandoned or the agency considers them in danger. Michigan courts can also decline to take jurisdiction over a child regarding a domestic violence dispute if the state is deemed "an inconvenient forum" for the hearing. If a visiting family from Illinois had a domestic violence dispute while driving through Michigan, for example, the state would request Illinois to take jurisdiction. The state also can take legal custody of children in a domestic case if it has concern that one of the involved parties will leave the state with them. Restraining Orders Michigan refers to restraining orders as "domestic relationship personal protection orders." The domestic relationship PPO allows a judge to order the abuser to stay away from the victim and to stop all harassing or threatening activities. It also can give the victim temporary, sole custody of any children until a court can examine the case in greater detail. Authorities frequently issue a temporary stay-away order against an alleged abuser immediately following a domestic abuse incident to allow a "cooling-off" period for both parties. An attorney or a police officer can help direct you in filing for a more permanent restraining order or you can request assistance from an advocacy group such as the Michigan Coalition Against Domestic and Sexual Violence. Additional Statutes Michigan has a five-year statute of limitations on domestic violence charges on both a criminal and a civil level. A woman abused by her significant other has five years to file a criminal complaint or a lawsuit seeking compensation for damages. Local police departments must report domestic violence statistics in their districts to the state police department so the state can keep accurate records of domestic violence incidents.
Monday, October 14
Sunday, October 13
No matter what he says you are Beautiful.
No matter how many times he hit you, you can still get up.
It's the life you are in now but you don't have to stay.
No matter what he says You can find someone to love you the RIGHT way!
Your heart hurts in a way you never thought it could.
He will never stop until you are dead.
It is a chance you will have to take I know it may seem unfair.
It's only one step towards the door don't walk RUN!
Don't ever look back that life is not for you.
Your heart beats as you run.
Your mind is racing in a million directions.
The things you left behind are just that THINGS.
You have your LIFE now move forward.
Don't look back that Life was not meant for you!
Stop the Cycle End Domestic Violence today!
Keys to car, house, work
Important papers for you and your children
Social security cards
School and medical records
Bankbooks, credit cards
Passports, green cards, work permits
Mortgage payment book, unpaid bills
PPO, divorce papers, custody orders
Pictures, jewelry, things that mean a lot to you
Items for your children (toys, blankets, etc.)
Everyday someone is getting abuse someone is getting beat someone is running away to stay alive. Is it you? There is Help if you want it. Please consider these facts. Did you know every 9 seconds a woman is abused?
Those who leave are 75% at risk of being killed.
Domestic violence is the leading cause of injury to women—more than car accidents, muggings, and rapes combined.
More than three women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends everyday in the US.
Men who as children witnessed their parents’ domestic violence were twice as likely to abuse their own wives than sons of nonviolent parents.
The same goes for little girls who witness their mother being abuse will think and stay because it will be normal to them.
SPEAK UP IT'S NOT NORMAL IT'S NOT LOVE!
Speak up it's wrong Please end the Abuse today if not for you for your children. Let your children grow up knowing Love doesn't hurt!
There are a lot of risk factors in leaving I know I have been there I have been in your shoes. Don't let the fear take over you deserve much more. No matter who you are someone cares Please call for help
The National Domestic Violence Hotline
Tuesday, October 8
The purple ribbon has become a unifying symbol of courage, survival, honor and dedication to ending domestic violence.
Though the purple ribbon’s origins are hard to pinpoint, families and friends have adopted it as a symbol of people who lost their lives at the hands of someone they once loved and trusted.
Purple ribbons are...
They demonstrate support of victims and advocates, and they convey an important message: